My Fears Abound

Copyright ©1996 by Richard J. Sereday Jr.
All rights reserved

Once I believed in love.

I believed in trust.

I believed in promises.

I believed in marriage.

I believed in my wife.

I believed in forever.

I believed in all these things
with no reasons to believe.

After my loss of love,
fears abound.

Can I and should I ever
believe in anyone
or anything again?

I now fear love.

I now fear trust.

I now fear
promising my heart
to someone.

I fear exposing my heart
to more potential heartbreak.

I fear committing my all
to a relationship of love.

I now fear marriage,
and I question the worthiness
of wedding vows,
the idea of a wife,
and of forever.

Will I ever love again?

Am I still able?

How long would forever last
this time?

How can I believe again?

How can I trust again?

How could I trustingly
give my heart
to anyone again,
and who would want it, anyway?

It's damaged goods,
as of yet
not in my possession,
still in "Cupid's" workshop,
undergoing extensive repairs.

When returned
will it be capable
of loving again,
and if so,
to what degree?

Should I risk
the pain
that could come
with the involvement of
another relationship?

So many question,
so few answers.

The fear of making
another wrong decision,
another painful mistake,
another commitment to trust,
to love,
and to believe in forever.

So slow am I to
risk exposure
to the pain I have
grown to fear so.

Is this the way it is to be
from this day forward,
or can I
overcome my fear
in time?

Only time will tell.